Monday, November 28, 2011

Meaty Tea


INT. Kitchen - DAY

MICHAEL AND STEVE ARE LEANING AGAINST THE COUNTER IN THE KITCHEN  CLEANING THEIR COFFEE CUPS

Michael:
What? I must have been drinking something with milk in it, it’s all slimy inside
Steve:
Milkshake?
Michael:
All the boys are in the yard
Steve:
Is it better than mine?
Michael:
Damn right its better than yours
Steve:
Could you teach me?
Michael:
I would have to charge

MICHAEL AND STEVE CONTINUE TO CLEAN THEIR CUPS. STEVE REACHES FOR THE BOX OF TEA BAGS.

Michael:
Did you want to try one of my Argentinean teas?
Steve:
Your what now?
Michael:
I got some Argentinean tea at the markets on the weekend
Steve:
Oh
Michael:
You want to try it?
Steve:
Sure, I guess

MICHAEL REACHES INTO HIS POCKET AND PULLS OUT A PLAIN LOOKING TEA BAG

Steve:
cheers

MICHAEL PULLS OUT A SECOND TEA BAG

Steve:
So what does it taste like?
Michael:
It’s a bit weird - smokey, kind of like a warn cup of jerky

MICHAEL TURNS OFF THE KETTLE EARLY AND POURS WATER INTO HIS AND STEVE'S CUP. THEY START DUNKING AND STEVE SNIFFS IS TEA AND LOOKS AT MICHAEL SUSPICIOUSLY.

Steve:
It is starting to smell a little meaty. How are you meant to have “Argentinean” tea?
Michael:
Medium rare

STEVE SHAKES HIS HEAD AND TUTS

Michael:
What? It’s a little meaty isn’t it?

STEVE GOES TO THE FRIDGE AND LOOKS INSIDE

Michael:
You’re not meant to have milk with it
Steve:
I’m not looking for milk; I’m looking for BBQ sauce

END

Thursday, November 3, 2011

October



Good morning viewers of the collective,

Of all the months in the year, October was one of them for the Chess Hammer. The life has returned to the site and new projects have kicked off as old ones come to a close. Check out the dribblings from contributors in Archives. You won't be disappointed, but mainly confused.

Three mediocre heroes made the Archive of Mediocre Superheroes and a big shout out goes to Sean, who has been slaving away and drawing the heroes. This month saw The Incredible Man, who is never believed; Catman, who can survive large falls; and Broken Thermostat Man, who has the ability to make a room uncomfortably warm.

In a dark corner of the blogosphere mumbling to himself is Rusty. This month he talked about Twitter, Steve Jobs (like everybody else), weird holidays and earthquakes over at Swinging like a rusty gate.

Don’t make eye contact with him.

Stay tuned folks, and have a cup of insaniTEA on us,

The Chess Hammer